This is farewell to absolutezero01

I rode horses yesterday. That was fun. Hope to get to ride them again later.

I'm sorry....

Let's call this the quiet city:
Where screams are felt as a wave of stoplights
Drive through the the streets as gunshots punctuate the night
The sides we take divide us from our faith
And the mourning dove gets caught in the telephone wire

Asleep you set the fire in your own house
And the night was a knife that cut
And I'm paralyzed

Cross out the eyes
Blur all the lines
Tearing this canvas from the wall
We crossed out the eyes
Put lines through these cries
We pulled all the leaves from the trees that fall

A silent dance that we did into this hospital bed
Hear voices from another room
"It happens all the time"
But July in the sand
Then the leaves that fall
And counting down our days to live....
Drain the blood from this valentine.

"We can rise on the wings of the dove
See blue skies getting caught in the trail of all this smoke
We can rise like candles in the dark your always"
and an envelope marked with your new address

It was the first time face to face
I'm crossing the line
Talking to the other side of death
Hearing the words that choke memories into flatlines
I'm calling your name hoping for something to wash these dreams of you away

Our fence was blown down in a winter storm and this field
stretched out of this world into the sound of a trace of blood in a love song
What can we do to put a stop to the coming white days?
I'm hoping the snow will push these dreams of you away

I don't even know why I keep this thing going anymore.

Wow, I love my life.

These are the results of the calculations by Dr. Love:

loneliness		Michael Saylor
	89 %

Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between loneliness and Michael Saylor has a very good chance of being successful, but this doesn't mean that you don't have to work on the relationship. Remember that every relationship needs spending time together, talking with each other etc.

 

These are the results of the calculations by Dr. Love:

no one		Michael Saylor
	85 %

Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between no one and Michael Saylor has a very good chance of being successful, but this doesn't mean that you don't have to work on the relationship. Remember that every relationship needs spending time together, talking with each other etc.

These are the results of the calculations by Dr. Love:

heart break		Michael Saylor
	92 %

Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between heart break and Michael Saylor has a very good chance of being successful, but this doesn't mean that you don't have to work on the relationship. Remember that every relationship needs spending time together, talking with each other etc.

These are the results of the calculations by Dr. Love:

women		Michael Saylor
	19 %

Dr. Love thinks a relationship might work out between women and Michael Saylor, but the chance is very small. A successful relationship is possible, but you both have to work on it. Do not sit back and think that it will all work out fine, because it might not be working out the way you wanted it to. Spend as much time with each other as possible. Again, the chance of this relationship working out is very small, so even when you do work hard on it, it still might not work out.

 

wow that has made me feel good.

I'm fasting right now, and it is really cool. You feel alot better. Last time I had anything to eat was sunday, may 30 at about 10:30pm. I'm aiming to do a 46 day fast to beat that magician guy who did it for 45 days. I have 2 days complete only 44 more to go. I read on web md that fasting helps your mental state. Also says the secret to a long life for a mammal is under-nutriated, but not malnutriated. Also says that after my fasting if I cut back to eating 60% less. I'll keep the weight off, plus should extend life. I think this will help me get closer to God, and get back into physical shape as well as a better mental status. Which all I need to change if I ever want people not to be scared when I get sad apparently. So I want to try to fix these things if I ever hope to get what I want.

I'm disabling it. So that if you want to see what xanga says, you have to come to the actual page, and not the subscription broswer stuff.

I need to get away from alot of things right now. So goodbye xanga for sometime being. I leave you this song as my final thought.

"The Reason"

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

Awake once again from my dreams. Seems I can't ever sleep anymore. My dream was about Amanda and just like the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. My mind was trying to erase her so we traveled to different parts of my mind and different memories that happened in the past. In the end we ended up in a house and looking out of the window I watched a tornado rip everything apart. It was the end of the line. No where else to run. We sat on the couch holding each other and she said, "I don't want to go tomorrow." I could only say, "I don't want you to go, but we both know that in real life this is how you would want it."